Dubai International Film Festival

I will miss you Cavan...

This has been pending since the 27th of November but I couldnt bring myself to write this blog msg without crying.

Yesterday was Cav's funeral, and no i didnt go...

For those of you who dont know Cav (and I will be surprised if you dont) he is (I dont think i would ever be able to use 'was' for Cav) one of the most amazing people I have ever known.

I met him first in college, ECMIT, through Hemant. Hemant would pick me and Cavan from work (Cavan and hemant worked together) on the way to ECMIT. Then I got to know him just as 'Hemant's friend'. Then I had to get my laptop fixed and Hemant suggested Cav do it coz he was such a wiz kid with IT and stuff... Thats when we got to know each toehr better.

Over the years I wont say we have been the best of friends or even close...it was actually Hemant that was the connecting link...but we kept in touch even after I finished college.

We would have email conversations and discussions and so called 'gender wars' and simple kiddish arguments over nothing and everything. As much as I knew Cavan was a total sweetheart...someone truly with a heart of gold and the warmth to melt anyone's heart...

I first heard about Cav's cancer through Hemant again. It was something that I just didnt know how to react to....All I could do was pray with fingers crossed that Cav would be alright. The fact that Cav took it so casually only made me feel even more strongly that everything would be ok...

Little did I know Cav was sheilding his own fears from others...

They operated him and everythign was alright. I met him after that and he seemed alright...life went on as usual...till i heard the news...

Cav had been hit again and this time it was much much worse than the last. The cancer had hit his lungs and was eating in...again it was hemant who told me and i was dumbfounded...

Everytime I spoke to Cav he would put things so casually as if the cancer never existed. Hemant would keep me updated and how things were getting bad to worse but I really didnt wanna believe him....I wanted to believe Cav...

Then when I heard he had been put on chemo I realised things were getting bad....doctors gave him very little time...I knew it was late but I wnated to try. I started researching....not medicine, because i knew what could be done must have been done....I started praying..

I had heard fo the Novena prayers froma a friend and although Im a hindu I would belioeve in anythign that could make things better for Cav...

For a while I thought it did make things better...everytime I spoke to Cav or chatted with him he kept telling me things were the same. I thought he had reached a plateau where it wasnt exactly getting worse...little did i realise things being the same meant it was getting worse...

I never met him while he was ill and to be really honest avoided it because I knew I would break down. I always wanted to know Cav as the guy with the real sweet smile, a relaxed air about him and ever so positive about life. The guy who could touch people's heart...

Cav has brought in front of me facts of life that I have so been avaoiding. That life is too short... always! When you know how little time is left is when you start prioritizing...then you start understanding and realising what really matters ... Thanks Cav for opening my eyes....I will never forget you!!!!!!!!

If you want to know Cav better, check him blog...http://cavan.wydarabia.net/

It hasnt been updated for a while, but you will know what an amazing person he is and will always be!

I'll miss you Cavan ...